We’re now two years into a pandemic that forced us all to be stuck with our families and endure very bad Zoom jokes. Even though we have readily available vaccinations and the brunt of Covid-19 infections has gone down — and we’re mostly back to our crappy way of life — Covid variants are still a major concern. And since many of them seem to have a variety of names that sound very similar to ’80s bands, we thought it would be good to find ‘80s bands that would make the perfect next covid variant name.
Cover Photo: Aaron Rapoport / Contributor (Getty Images)
These 80s Bands That Double As Perfect Next Covid Variant Name
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8. AC/DC
A lot of Covid variants seem to include a variation of letters. So what better name than ACDC, right? She shook me all night long, only it was due to a high fever and body aches.
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7. Anthrax
Nothing screams "a deadly and scary disease" quite like the name "Anthrax." After all, the '80s hard metal band took its name from a biological weapon.
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6. The B-52's
With the present Covid variant being BA.2, it only seems apt that the next one be named after '80s new wave band the B-52s. A love shack sounds like a really nice place to quarantine.
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5. Dokken
While this '80s glam metal band might not as instantly recognizable, their name just screams a fatal and contagious disease.
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4. Fugazi
You can almost hear Dr. Anthony Fauci saying the name of this '80s post-hardcore band on CNN. Be sure to wear a mask and protect yourself against the Fugazi strain.
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3. Ratt
The very fact that this '80s big hair metal band is named after a species that leads to the bubonic plague is sufficient enough to be a Covid variant.
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2. The Cure
Alright, while we readily admit that '80s goth alt-band The Cure seems more fitting to be associated with a vaccine than the variant, anti-vaxxers might believe that Dr. Fauci and the Deep State are naming it this to force another vaccine.
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1. U2
Again, so many of these Covid variants seem to get their names from a variety of letter and number variations, and we can think of no bigger one than '80s rock band U2. In fact, lead singer Bono sounds like an even better name for the next Covid variant.
