Every relationship gets tested at some point in its lifecycle. From choosing what to eat for dinner to deciding on what show to binge for the next three weeks straight, couples are destined to butt heads along the road to avoiding loneliness. But nothing tests the bonds of love more than a hike through the woods.
Just ask Ashley Olsen, former Full House star and current fashion tycoon whose rare sighting in the woods can only be described as machete chic. (Which happens to be the new look of love that’s inspiring our next summer fling.)
The famously discreet Olsen was photographed by her boyfriend Louis Eisner who posted the snap to Instagram sans caption. And while the drink in Olsen’s left hand screams relaxation, the machete is more of an enigma.
Sure, it perfectly matches her Yeezy sneakers and monochromatic look, but this must-have accessory is more than the work of mere fashion. Our first instinct is to say that Olsen is a badass who chops her way through dense woodland to take the road less traveled.
But based on her private tendencies (and sheer lack of jungle in the background), Olsen might be sending the message to Eisner that if he posts this pic to social media she’ll slice him up good and leave him for the coyotes.
Of course, maybe she just wanted to have a machete up her sleeve in case her beau tried to steer them off the easy trail toward the 12-mile loop. After all, her beverage was clearly running dangerously low and with this current heatwave, no one can take hydration too seriously.
Either way, we love the casual danger and high-stakes drama Olsen’s bringing to the world of relationship squabbles. Because of this, we’re currently resetting our relationship goals to find someone who, next time we sit down to veg out and can’t decide between another murder doc and a ’90s rom-com, will be sure to have her knives out.
Cover Photo: Instagram (Louis Eisner)
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