Verbal communication is dying. OK, it’s dead as disco. Our thumbs move more than our mouths and, despite the incoming carpal tunnel, we can barely spell correctly. Now, here we are in an emoji and GIF-filled smackdown where only the strongest memes survive. With that, we offer a healthy solution: bringing back the best of our lost words in an attempt to save our illiterate souls.
Our species has enjoyed insulting one another since the dawn of time, and these wordplay classics may be forgotten, but their sting never dies. Whether these omissions describe you and your questionable behavior or everyone else, from the babblers to the ballbusters, let’s put people back in check by considering the reinsertion of these clever jabs back into your shit-talking arsenal.
Cover Photo: Alessandro Biascioli / EyeEm (Getty)
Looking back: Ranking the 10 Greatest Netflix Originals of 2019
Looking ahead: Gwyneth Paltrow’s ‘Goop Lab’ Is Netflix’s Newest Stranger Thing (of Orgasms and Exorcisms)
Lost Words To Revitalize
-
Yoink
Someone has something you want, Yoink that shit!
-
Wallering
For those well-deserved hungover days when you don't leave your apartment and just Waller around in your own slop.
-
Testie
An idiot check, like sending that email to yourself first to proofread ... or the family jewels.
-
Sack
Prowess, or a place to secure the Testies.
-
Virile
Sounds diseased, but trust, you want to exemplify this characteristic.
-
Horny
The gooey sensation of being Virile.
-
Muff
Go out with your old horny buddies, troll for some new Muff!
-
Claptrap
The verbal BS spewed by other’s that is just too ridiculous to even handle
-
Gum Flapper
Gum Flapper - the source of all this unnecessary Claptrap!
-
Finagle
When you need to escape a sticky situation that your own Gumflapping and Yoinking has probably gotten you into.
