Photo: Getty Images
Toys “R” Us going out of business isn’t just the sad end to a American-loved era, it’s the beginning of a subterfuge, millennials looking for a chance to party.
We already caught one man cheating the retailer last month who may or may not have been complicit into the chain’s demise. But now it appears other mischievous young’ins are taking advantage of the stores’ closings …
By throwing giant raves.
#ResponseTeamC and #ResponseTeamB have disrupted an unlicensed music event in #Hounslow and five arrests made. #411TX pic.twitter.com/pwHbRxKCCA
— Hounslow MPS (@MPSHounslow) March 31, 2018
Reportedly hundreds of hooligans thought it would be clever to pile into a recently abandoned Toys R Us in West London on Easter weekend.
It wasn’t long before the ‘event’ was raided by police.
Apparently, there were tickets for the event, and the police urged others to stay away from the area and that ticket holders were being turned away. This has become a problem locally, according to The Telegraph. The number of unlicensed events have doubled between 2016 to 2017, and it has been linked to the decline of suitable venues in the past decade.
So essentially clubs are going out of style and all the kids on molly looking to party are desperate to carry on the rave. It’s kind of like watching the end of disco but Y2K style.
Oh boy: Teens Cause $15K Worth Of Damage During Rave At Airbnb That 14-Year-Old Rented Using Parents Credit Card
Listen, if you want to party, then party. But do it on your own dime. There are literally an endless amount of better ways to take advantage of an abandoned Toys “R” Us legally.
Here are just a few.
Open a petting zoo (with a real Jeffrey the giraffe!).
Turn it into a wedding venue (people are nostalgic).
Start a church (no more idolatry!).
Open an animal shelter (everyone loves dogs).
Start a gym (no frosted tips allowed).
Turn it into an incubator (a new miniature Silicon Valley?).
I’m sad to see the end of Toys “R” Us. But I’m happy to see that ragers are slowly dying.
Josh Helmuth is a sports reporter in St. Louis who contributes to Mandatory.