National Boyfriend Day is Oct. 3. Does your girlfriend know? If she does, we’re guessing she’ll do something considerate but low-key in your honor, like give you a card, a kiss, and take you out for tacos. While that all sounds great, we’ve been fantasizing about how we’d really like to be celebrated on this most underrated of holidays. Whether our dream gift is edible, visual, or (um) tactile, we think these 11 things are all doable, if she’s willing. Leave this tab open on your screen of choice and hope that when she does her daily snooping, she gets the hint. If not, you’ll have to celebrate yourselves, gentlemen. Good luck!
Cover Photo: JGI/Daniel Grill (Getty Images)
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National Boyfriend Day
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Watch Sports With Us (Without Distracting Us)
We know most girlfriends will never be as into sports as we are, and that's OK. But when it's a really big game, we'd really love their company at the tailgate or our buddy's place. Just, please, girlfriends, watch the game with us, don't hold a symposium on that new crop top you bought mid-play.
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Chug Beer With Us
Just once, we'd like to see our girlfriends go wild and chug a pitcher of our favorite brew with us. Bonus points if she wears a swimsuit while doing it.
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Grill Us a Steak
There's nothing we like more than a slab of meat and an open fire, but even grill masters like ourselves need a day off duty once in a while. Steak really isn't that complicated, and we wish our girlfriends were willing to YouTube how to make one for us.
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Make Us a Sexy Dessert
Special occasions demand exceptional desserts. We don't care if it's perfect. We just like sharing something sugary, chocolatly, and messy with our girlfriends after a nice meal. What makes it sexy is seeing her enjoying the indulgence.
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Buy Us the Good Weed
Our girlfriends know our go-to strains, but they're only our go-tos because they get the job done on our (admittedly puny) budget. We'd love it if our girlfriends splurged on a top-shelf strain and surprised us with the ultimate high.
Related: What Your Favorite Weed Strain Says About You
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Joy Ride
We'd love it if our girlfriends rented a sweet vintage car, picked us up, and let us drive as fast and as far as we wanted to, just for a few hours. The engine revving, the wind in our hair, her by our side. That's National Boyfriend Day bliss, right there.
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Leave Us Alone in Our Man Cave
It'd be swell if we could disappear into our man cave for a while (or all day) and just do whatever weird thing we do down there without our girlfriends checking in on us every 10 minutes. We're not neglecting you, girlfriends, we're just wired to want to tinker in solitude sometimes. It's a biological need.
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Send Us a Hot Selfie
We know you're not "that kind of girl," girlfriends. But we also know that you like turning us on, and we get turned on by nudes. Or semi-nudes. Or whatever you're comfortable with. We promise to delete it after viewing. Definitely. Maybe.
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Do a Striptease
We know our girlfriends are not professionals, but that's not the point. We just like to know that they're willing to try something new, and maybe a little mortifying, to get a rise out of us. If it'll make you feel better, girlfriends, we'll do one for you, too, Magic Mike style.
Related: Jennifer Lopez's 'Hustlers' Is Out (And Here Are Our Other Favorite Movies With Strippers)
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Give Us a BJ
Really, we'd like this any day of the year. It truly is the greatest gift on Earth. Please, girlfriends. We (ain't too proud to) beg of you. And we'll return the favor.
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Keep On Loving Us
Now for a sappy one. We know we're not easy to love, so most of all on this National Boyfriend Day, we hope our girlfriends continue to stick by and adore us despite all our flaws and foibles. You're better women than we deserve, girlfriends, and we know it.
