When you weren’t sporting a middle-part-bowl-cut your hair was once a crusty mess of Dep. Your daily uniform was a plaid-shirt-cargo-short combo. And don’t get us started on your taste in music. Whatever was on your Discman, it was regrettable, so to let you get ahead of that shame we’re bringing to light some current trends you’re going to wish you never bought into.
It’s not even for sale yet, but we’re already imagining all that will go wrong here — from radiation on your wrist, to cracking the screen every time you gesticulate wildly at your desk, not to mention appearing like an Inspector Gadget throwback whenever you converse with Siri. Also? It’s just plain ugly.
They’ll be completely out of style right around when your sperm count’s completely been wiped out, due to lack of oxygen.
Yes, we’re talking about the tiny gadget that would be counting your steps, if it wasn’t already layers deep in your junk drawer.
If you have the same hair as Johnny Bravo, you should probably re-evaluate that life choice.
No one wants to get up in there, so let the fad pass, bust out the shears, and get re-acquainted with a romantic life.
Socks serve a multifold purpose. They’re a receptacle for your foot sweat and odor, and provide a cushion of comfy between flesh and footwear. Bring them back, please.
Sure, it might sound deliciously exciting now, but after another few years of popular-lunch-item-wrapped-in-popular-breakfast-item, or pizza-topped-with-something-that-should-never-be-on-a-pizza, or waffle-cone-filled-with-savory-hodge-podge, we’ll tire of this trend, and leave the mash-ups to potatoes. And rightfully so.
