Ryan Lochte Lied About Getting Robbed

Earlier this week, Ryan Lochte‘s mom told the media her son was robbed, the Brazilian authorities were like “sounds like bullshit”, then Ryan Locthe held a press conference to say he was robbed by people claiming to be Brazil police. Then he fled the country. The other two alleged victims, Jack Conger and Gunnar Bentz, were physically removed from their flight and are now being detained by Brazilian authorities. Why? Because Brazil has the receipts. Specifically, the security footage of the men returning to the Olympic Village. 

The footage, captured by security camera just inside a checkpoint, is time-stamped 6:56am Sunday, several hours after the four gold medal winners say they were targeted by an armed gang posing as police…The four Americans told police their attackers stripped them of their wallets containing 700 Reals – equivalent to $224 – but surprisingly didn’t take their phones.

So they took $224 but not phones that would’ve been worth more? Weird, huh?

In the video, Lochte is seen jokingly hitting Feigen over the head with his Olympic badge after going through the metal detectors…But police in Brazil were unable to find any evidence supporting the Americans’ tale of a harrowing robbery, and the judge noted it took them nearly three hours to return to the Olympic Village from a club that was only 30 to 40 minutes away. Lochte and his pals claimed men posing as police robbed them at gunpoint after leaving the club. He said they did not originally tell US Olympic officials “because we were afraid we’d get in trouble.”

Get in trouble for what, you might ask? Welp.

So long story short, Ryan Lochte and his bros got hit with the Brazilian prostitute pussy surge pricing and didn’t have a promo code, so they got pissed and tried to fight some security guards, then Lochte had to call and lie to his mama about why she needs to send that wire transfer. But he underestimated his mom’s, a Florida woman, need to get in front of a camera and tell America some brown people robbed her son. Glad we cleared this up before Breitbart told Trump to nuke Brazil.