Sasquatch 2016 Festival Survival Guide: 10 Tips For Rocking The Gorge

If you’re headed to the wonderful wilderness of Washington for the Sasquatch 2016 festival this weekend, you’ll be joining tens of thousands of music lovers (including us!) in the pit rocking out to Florence + The Machine, Disclosure, Major Lazer and more. Check out the full lineup for what’s in store this year at the majestic camp-away fest.

Naturally, the key to an awesome Sasquatch experience is preparation, and battling the elements in the Pacific Northwest can be quite a challenge at times. Here are a few things you should keep in mind in order to make sure your Sasquatch weekend is as comfortable and kickass as possible, and you don’t wind up with a collapsed tent, missed performances and a bad time all around.

10. Get there early – with a full gas tank

Sure, the 9-5 grind will get in the way of this one, but if you can cut out of work a few hours ahead of schedule to get there as early as possible on Friday, you’ll save yourself an impossibly long wait to get in. Getting caught in the gridlock of last-minute camper arrivals and day trippers means you’re gonna have a bad time – and that’s no way to kick off your Sasquatch experience!

Whatever the case, the comings and goings of the vehicular masses is going to burn fuel like there’s no tomorrow, so make sure you fill up entirely before heading out to The Gorge.

9. Bring toilet paper

Look. It’s a gross detail, but you’re hours from the closest town, and the port-a-potties are a disgusting mess by midday on Day Two at Sasquatch. History tells us that on occasion, toilet paper can become the most valuable and desperately sought-after commodity at a weekend music festival. Do yourself a favor and don’t leave the most intimate necessities to chance. Bring more than a few rolls of toilet paper as backup – you’d be amazed at the gratitude and goodwill complete strangers will show just by looking out for your fellow man – or woman. Be prepared.

8. Don’t drink till the sun goes down  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The fastest way to dehydrate yourself is to start throwing ’em back while the sun’s shining down on you. Once the day starts to cool off, you can partake in the glory of a $300 drink. But there’s a reason you see dozens of faceplanted fools down for the count before Day Two even kicks off – party when it’s time to party.

7. Moderate your intake

Stumbling drunk into tents on the campground is no way to pick up chicks. Not only that, but it would be a good idea to steer clear of the temptation to moonwalk in front of cops while chugging a bottle of Jack Daniel’s. This isn’t a frat party, and you’re in it for the long haul. Also, make sure you don’t share – people caught providing alcohol to those without wristbands will be immediately kicked out of the festival. Know your limits, and… 

6. Get some sleep!

No matter what you put in your body, three days in the sun is gonna take its toll. Clock at least 5-6 hours of sleep each night, so you can be refreshed and raring to go in the morning. And by morning, we mean mid-afternoon. 

5. Bring your own food 

Don’t want to break the bank on nasty festival grub? Sasquatch lets you bring your own food, which also happens to be a godsend for those extra recreational goodies. Pack enough for you and a friend each day, and save yourself some serious cash. Besides, how much greasy chow mein and cafeteria pizza can you really stomach in one weekend? Sasquatch needs to take a hint from Bonnaroo and Outside Lands and step up their culinary game.

4. Be smart about your stash

Use common sense about what you do decide to bring. It’s a much more relaxed atmosphere at Sasquatch than, say, the TSA-shaming entrypoints at Coachella, but being casual about broadcasting your recreational plans could result in a very bad day for you. And no matter how good the deal sounds, don’t buy anything on the fields or at the campsite but what grows naturally: you never know what you’re getting.

3. Make a schedule, do your homework 

Evil scheduling conflicts mean you will inevitably miss some performances you’ll wish you had seen, but if you plan ahead you can cut down on the missed moments. Set your Sasquatch schedule right here, but try to be flexible – chances are, there are some artists on the bill you’re unfamiliar with. Pleasant surprises await…

2. Charge up! Bring backup! 

Your phone battery is going to deplete faster than you can say, “Wait, I’m not finished uploading that pic of Sufjan Stevens in his Ultimate Warrior costume!” Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook apps are energy vampires that will leave you digitally stranded in no time.

Keep your charger on you, and consider taking the cheap leap into the world of portable chargers. There will be charging stations for mobile devices set up in various locations. Use them as often as you can – you don’t want technology failing on you at the worst possible time. 

1. Hoodies, jackets, ponchos, oh my!

Make sure you’re packing extra layers, because local weather forecasters are predicting high-forties temperatures once the sun goes down at The Gorge. Poncho up to be fully prepared in the event of rain, or even the occasional hailstorm! Tank tops and shorts are great in the daytime, but it’s not easy to rock out when you’re freezing your ass off. Furthermore, it’s nigh-impossible to work any mojo with the ladies when your entire body looks like frozen chicken skin.

See you at the Gorge!

Photos: Johnny Firecloud
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