The MTV Video Music Awards always succeeds in fueling sensationalistic headlines, but this year they all but did away with music entirely for the sake of obsessing over trash celebrating trash in a sleaze-fest of ridiculous nonsense that perfectly encapsulates why Donald Trump is being taken seriously as a presidential candidate and pop culture itself has become a driving force of Dumb & Proud in America.
Here’s what you may have missed if you didn’t catch this year’s VMAs:
Miley Cyrus is far more than the queen of bubblegum sleaze. If you did a lend of ecstasy and crystal meth with the girl from Hot Dog on a Stick while watching a marathon of Adult Swim programming, you might get an idea of where she was coming from with her kaleidoscope of retarded outfits Sunday night. Her tits popped out, she swore her ass off and announced (after closing out the show with a performance) that her new album, “Miley Cyrus & Her Dead Petz,” was now streaming online for free. Does anyone care? No – because this shit has nothing to do with music.
Nicki Minaj took on about three different personalities after opening the show with a hatchet-burying performance with Taylor Swift to the latter’s hit “Bad Blood”. Accepting the best hip-hop video award for her song “Anaconda,” Minaj thanked her pastor in a weird cutesy voice before going full Jeckyll & Hyde, shifting personalities to go at Miley over a recent New York Times story in which Cyrus appeared to side with Swift in her past beef with the rapper.
“And now, back to this bitch that had a lot to say about me the other day in the press,” Minaj said, gesturing at Cyrus. “Miley, what’s good?”
Miley replied with some nonsense about the media twisting things, but judging by Minaj’s reaction before the cutaway, that was far from the end of the issue. Manufactured beef in 3..2..1…
Then there was Taylor Swift presenting Kanye West with a Video Vanguard award, after which the world’s most bloviating, self-congratulating egomaniac spoke until we damn near fell asleep, dropping “bro” nearly 20 times as he rambled nonsensically for over ten minutes. He was given a meaningless trophy on a video awards show put on by a network that doesn’t air music videos anymore, and ranted for an ungodly amount of time about nothing at all. Soak that in.
In his high-fashion shit-colored sweatsuit Kanye touched on every topic imaginable without actually making any points, constantly stopping mid-sentence, and attempting some sort of new mission statement of the millennials before making the most ridiculous announcement of all: he’s running for president in 2020.
Does he have your vote America? @kanyewest accepts the Video Vanguard award http://t.co/pyg3SBh8gq
— MTV (@MTV) August 31, 2015
Everybody’s favorite new wave troll-doll brat Justin Bieber sang “Where Are U Now” and his new single “What Do You Mean,” but what would an appearance be at such a show without theatrical antics? On cue, baby Biebs broke down onstage, damn near full-on sobbing. Let’s not speculate – the shit was orchestrated, just like Chris Brown’s breakdown during his performance at the BET Awards in 2010 following all the bad press he got after assaulting Rihanna.
