Photo: Jacky Simanzik / EyeEm (Getty Images)
If the internet were around during grandma’s “heyday,” would her time have been just as weird as 2018 was? Think about it: were there people having sex with cars post-World War II? Were people being warned about zombies while leaving Woodstock? We’re people selling “art” made of poop while catching the latest Bob Ross episode? We’ll never know.
Thanks to social media and the internet age of today, we now know that times are weird as hell. And while we can’t prove it, 2018 appears to have been a record-setter when it comes to the strange stories.
Below are just a small slice of the insane, bizarro pie of 2018’s weirdness. Reader beware: don’t eat while reading this article.
Weirdest brazen crime of 2018: Dad Uses Toddler to Steal Prizes From Vending Machine
Out of this world: Former Blink-182 Vocalist Tom DeLonge On A Mission To Prove UFOs Are Real
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Josh Helmuth is a sports reporter in St. Louis who contributes to Mandatory.
Weirdest Most Viral Stories Of 2018
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Actor Who Played Barney Is Now A Tantric Sex Therapist Charging $350 Per Session
Who knew the guy who played a lovable, children's dinosaur ended up being quite the, um, entreporneur. Just kidding, it's not porn, per se. Is it? Whatever "tantric sex" is, we think we can all agree it's kinky.
Photo: Lyle A. Waisman (Getty Images)
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Missouri Woman Busted With Loaded Gun Hidden In Her Vagina
Possible inspiration for a new Orange Is The New Black plot? We didn't even know this was possible!
Photo: quintanilla (Getty Images)
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Kansas Man Tased And Arrested For Drunken Sex With Car
This ridiculous sex act really has us wondering if there's a whole new meaning to The Beatles' classic lyrics "Baby, you can drive my car." We guess you know you're not in Kansas anymore when you don't see people trying to have intercourse with automobiles?
Photo: Westend61 (Getty Images)
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Florida City Sends Out Zombie Alert Upon Power Outage
Probably the biggest "my bad" of 2018? Issuing a false alert regarding a zombie apocalypse. So Florida.
Photo: Gremlin (Getty Images)
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This Woman Thinks She Stays Beautiful Because She Drinks Dog Urine
We love dogs, but this woman who downs her puppy's pee is without a doubt the grossest voluntary action that went viral this year. You're welcome.
Photo: Robert Petrovic (Getty Images)
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A Giant Python Swallowed An Indonesian Villager...Again
It's one thing to hear about a horrific death that's hard to believe is real. But when you learn it's not even the first time this has happened, it's a whole 'nother story.
Photo: Matt Benoit (Getty Images)
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Just A Doctor Pulling A Live Cockroach Out Of A Guy's Ear
How long before you recognize an itch in your ear is actually a living being capable of surviving a nuclear war?
Photo: WIN-Initiative (Getty Images)
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These Ancient Books From a Danish Library Could Kill You
Dying to get a good read this winter? Be careful what you wish for. These ancient book in Europe were laced with poison.
Photo: Hans Barten (Getty Images)
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Russian Tattoo Addict Removes Penis For Ruining His "Look"
There can sometimes be a fine line between art and mutilation. We won't be going to this "artist" for any ink any time soon.
Photo: Kymberlie Dozois Photography (Getty Images)
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Brewery Sells "Vagina Beer" Made From "Essence of Hot Underwear Models"
We never thought there would be a beer that would make us want to give up drinking. And then "vagina beer" came along. What a time to be alive.
Photo: Dan Kitwood/Staff (Getty Images)
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Drug Tunnel Found In KFC Is Like A Real Life “Breaking Bad” Episode
Colonel Sanders, you've been holdin' out on us! No really, this was a scary situation and yet another reason all KFCs should be open forever.
Photo: UroshPetrovic (Getty Images)
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Swimmers Are Fighting Over Huge Blocks Of Marijuana Washing Up On Atlantic Coast
Why get high when you can float...over giant blocks of illegal drugs that magically wash up on the Coast?
Photo: Joe Raedle (Getty Images)
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Crossing Guard Faked Down Syndrome To Get Bathed And Diaper Changed
This guy doesn't just deserve to go to prison, but he does deserve a good ol' punch to the face. Or, just make him wear a diaper, in public, for the rest of his life. That's justice.
Photo: AsISeeIt (Getty Images)
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Novelist Who Penned 'How To Murder Your Husband,' Accused Of Murdering Husband
Ingenius or simply too obvious? This woman may have turned out to be 2018's most unlikely un-diagnosed psychopath.
Photo: CaseyHillPhoto (Getty Images)
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Maine Grandma Is Making A Crapload Off Art Made Of Moose Poop
Possibly our favorite story of the year: a grandma turns a major profit out of Moose poop. Just listen to her for 30 seconds and you'll instantly wish she were your Nana.
Photo: Jérémie LeBlond-Fontaine (Getty Images)
