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UFOs Left ‘Unaccounted For Pregnancies,’ New Pentagon Report Claims You Will Have This Alien’s Baby!

The next time your girlfriend gets pregnant while you’re out of town, don’t freak out. During this event, your first impulse will be to assume she got knocked up by the hot neighbor across the street. But slow your roll. There’s a perfectly reasonable explanation: UFOs.

Obviously. Because as much as you want to believe in casual infidelity, alien babies…

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