Friend Request from an Ex: Always a Bad Idea
Lane Cummings Explores the Mania of Facebook Friendships.
The other day I was perusing my Facebook news feed as I rarely do and I read the following update posted by an acquaintance: “I just got a ‘friend request’ from an ex-girlfriend. And I just accepted it. Why do I feel like it’s an awful mistake?”
I must say, I snickered when I read that because I knew all too well that it was in fact an awful mistake. I have been that ex-girlfriend who’s made the friend request on Facebook and my intentions weren’t good. Basically, I’d been thinking about my ex, or rather pining over my ex, and wanted to know if he was dating anyone. The rascal had the gall to set his profile to private and there was no way of me knowing. And with his profile set to private, I naturally assumed he wasn’t seeing anyone and was pining over me as well. He just hadn’t gotten around to friending me on Facebook.
He accepted my friend request right away, which I took to be a sign of him carrying an ever-lit torch for me. I truly cannot convey the levels of my shock and bewilderment at the fact he was actually seeing someone, or as Facebook proclaimed “in a relationship with” Miss Blah Blah Blah. I clicked on Miss Blah Blah Blah’s profile ready to scorn her out loud to my empty, darkened apartment and my dog. And I did. You should know several things: she’s short, frequently gets bad haircuts (bad!) and is way too hipstery for her own good. I mean, sheesh. If you’re going to wear red lipstick, a fur hat AND over sized sunglasses, please tell me it’s all part of some elaborate sidewalk performance art or strip tease, but not that you’re just going to mill about town like that. Come on.
This article is clearly showcasing the fact that the friend request from the ex-girlfriend is mostly an awful mistake on HER part. I’m sure they are in continual monogamous bliss, and that the negative break-up karma I send from afar is nothing but a pesky gnat-like presence. If that. However, I do check his profile once every few months to see if they’ve broken up. Now that I just wrote that and reread that last sentence, it truly does seem a bit disturbed. Ah well. Let’s move on. I also read her postings to his wall and judge them. Honestly, she strikes me as a bit needy.
In fact, while writing this article, I just checked his profile. He’s changed his profile picture. This is a rare occurrence and one we must analyze carefully. His new profile pic is moody and melancholy. Honestly, on a deeper more repressed level, I think he’s trying to tell me that he misses me.