Normally if I saw Brian Austin Green, I would give him a hammer strike to the temple and while he was flopping around on the ground like Hellen Keller at dinner time, I would nonchalantly take out my my serrated, open-assist Kershaw and ask him if he knew that the aorta runs the entire length of the torso. Then I realized that in between wrapping her legs around his head and using her as a feedbag, he has to listen to her talk all day. She rambles asinine nonsense in interviews, so God knows what comes out of her mouth when nobody is their to put in print. If I had to guess, she’s talking about how Bigfoot was responsible for the WTC bombings or how she wants to make her cat a licensed Tarot card reader.
Forgive us if we forget from time to time that Megan Fox is a mom. She just seems too hot…
