Katy Perry Wants None Of Taylor Swift

There’s nothing more hilarious than two white chicks who hate each other, because it’s mostly just passive aggressive shade and subtweets, so when Taylor Swift dropped Bad Blood, Katy Perry vowed revenge and through a third party, she dictated her plot for vengeance. Her plot for vengeance, of course, being another diss track. That’s cute. So when Katy Perry registered a track called “1984”, which of course is basically the same as the title of Taylor Swift’s last album, people just knew Perry’s was about to drop a cliche-riddled summer banger that gets heavy rotation because Katy Perry’s label has that in their budget.

Is Katy Perry finally firing back at Taylor Swift? According to her music publisher’s site, BMI, the “Roar” singer has registered a track called “1984” and fans are speculating the jam is her response to Swift’s hit track “Bad Blood” off her fifth studio album 1989. “Katy Perry just registered a song called ‘1984.’ Is she trying to come for Taylor???” one fan tweeted, while another offered: “KATY PERRY HAS RECORDED A SONG CALLED ‘1984’ THE SHADE IS SO REAL OMG.” 

However, when reached for comment, Katy Perry’s managers’ said, “look, we sat this bitch down in several seats. all good now.”

Katy Perry’s managers at Direct Management Group tell Us Weekly that the “Roar” hitmaker has no plans to wage a musical battle with Taylor Swift.

Look, we’ve all heard Taylor Swift’s songs, and we’ve all heard Katy Perry’s songs. If we’re being honest about our feelings for each, Katy Perry would just end up embarrassing herself worse than she does already. Amy Winehouse’s corpse can sing better than Katy Perry, and her lyrical writing style ends when she finds two words that kinda rhyme. Like, if Katy Perry had a double mastectomy, what other purpose would she serve on this planet? I’m hard pressed to think of one.