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The art of how to compliment a girl isn’t as easy as most guys think. There are layers, nuance to it, and despite what misogynistic guys think, the majority of women aren’t sheep that will swallow whatever you throw at them. A compliment can be received in two opposite ways, with genuine appreciation, or with fake appreciation that hides the disgust and anger a person feels when someone tries to manipulate them.
Therefore, there are certain rules on how to compliment a girl to actually make her feel good and make a basis for a connection.
Be Honest
You might think that a compliment is required to elevate your relationship with a woman, and you might be right, but it’s imperative that you be honest. First of all, the girl will most likely see through it which will result in your disqualification. Secondly, you’ll probably feel like a sleaze. Also, don’t ask for something right after giving a compliment as you’ll come off as a schemer even if you’re sincere, have at least a filler of a sentence before asking for a number or a date.
Be Specific
You’ll probably be complimenting a pretty girl, and the chances are she’s been told that she’s beautiful a hundred times that year alone. Being the 101st guy won’t do you much good, so you’ll need to be specific. Ask yourself what do you like most about her, her eyes, the way she looks, walks, talks, anything, and then tell it. Go the extra step and tell her why you like it, but watch out not to come off as cheezy. Which is where the next tip on how to compliment a girl comes in.
Be Profound
Don’t just focus on the physical aspect of a woman, like all people, they too like to be complimented on the intellectual side of their personality. The same point about being specific matters here, don’t just say that you think she’s smart. Complimenting her on specific actions rather than quantifiers is the better approach, and it will be easier to find the “why” for these types of compliments.
Be Modest in Delivery
You know how the guys from The Jersey Shore talk – well think of the opposite of that. You won’t look like a jackass when complimenting a girl if you’re not loud in your delivery, and if you use the same tone of voice you use when arranging a weekend bender. Talks slowly, gentler.
Be Succinct
Even though you should talk slower, more laid back, that doesn’t mean you should hold a TED talk on that thing you like about it. Say it, and move on, if you keep on rumbling on you might seem somewhat fake and definitely insecure. Making it seem casual, which you’ll do by following this and the last tip, will make the biggest impact. Don’t be redundant is basically what this is. Don’t be a guy repeats himself like “Oh my god, you’re eyes are amazing, like amazing. Wow. They’re insane. Such perfect eyes”.
Be Moderate
Use compliments sparingly and don’t shower the girl with them. Also be moderate in what you say, if her eyes are pretty, don’t automatically say that they are the prettiest eyes you ever saw. Not only that diminish your own value slightly and puts her on a high pedestal, it can also make you seem dishonest, and hence, a jackass. Even if she’s the most beautiful girl you ever saw, don’t shoot that first, the timing in the relationship you’re building needs to be right for releasing such nuclear bombs.
Be Playful
A very important mindset to have in order to know how to compliment a girl is to be playful. Keep in mind that you’re not a boss congratulating the employee on a job well done, you’re trying to build a report with someone. So joke around, it’s the best way for flirting, and perhaps the best method for doing it is the push/pull one. The idea is to follow the compliment with a small joke to break the tension which it creates, as some people may feel slightly stressed receiving praise.
Do you have some of your tips on how to compliment a girl and not appear like a douchebag?
