Driverless Car Pulled Over by Police Tries to Flee (That’s What We Call a Smart Car) This car's got chutzpah.
Police Capture Runaway Seal in Convenience Store Parking Lot, Nothing Convenient About It This was one unusual police chase.
Meanwhile in Florida: Man Arrested For Masturbating Inside Starbucks (Extra Cream) We'll take our coffee black from here on out, thanks.
Meanwhile in California: Burglar Bear on Run From Police After 50 Break-Ins, Camouflaging as Overgrown Beaver Until Things Cool Off His addiction to junk food is landing him in hot water, with authorities ready to bring the burglar bear in…
Meanwhile in Utah: 4-Year-Old Opens Fire at Police After Dad Complains About McDonald’s Order, Not a Happy Meal On the Richter scale of bad parenting, there is a definite hierarchy.
Meanwhile in Tennessee: Woman Exchanges Sex With 9 Students For Vape Pens, Vaping Somehow Has Worse Reputation Now Vaping somehow just got worse.
Meanwhile In Chicago: Mom of Train Robbery Suspect Drags Her Boy to Police Station, How Embarrassing Next time, just steal a few bucks from your mom's purse like a normal person.
Who Wants to Marry a Murderer? New Fox Series Follows Inmates in Love (With Nancy Grace as Your Boner-Killing Host) We'd kill to see this.
Meanwhile in Louisiana: Teacher Who Fed Students Semen-Laced Cupcakes Sentenced to 41 Years, Not Likely Allowed to Work the Cafeteria Think twice before you accept homemade treats, kids.
Meanwhile in Florida: Mom Shares Meth With Teenage Son to Calm Him Down (Mother Doesn’t Know Best, Apparently) Haven't you ever heard of weed?