The 2016 Rio Olympic Games have come and gone. And to be honest, I think those of us who closely followed the preceding events can breathe a huge sigh of relief.
Despite all the raw sewage flowing throughout the city, the over-run hospitals and bullets flying directly at media, the city of Rio and its hosted Olympics didn’t totally collapse. However, it also didn’t go without a hitch.
So at the end of the day, when we’re telling our grandkids about the ‘good ol’ days,’ how will we remember Rio 2016?
The Tongan flag bearer
Pita Taufatofua
… was his name. It doesn’t matter, it sounds like a delicious sandwich. Every woman (and most men) around the globe couldn’t take their eyes off the dude during the opening ceremonies. They lost their damn minds.
15 minutes of fame. Slicker than snot on a door knob ….
OLIVIER MORIN/AFP/Getty Images
Shaunae Miller’s Dive
Allyson Felix comes up short in the 400
Possibly the greatest finish in the history of the event, the Bahamian took the dive of her life to clip Felix (USA) by .07 to win the 400 meters.
THE PROPOSALS!
Cute … but enough already?
Records were shattered in Rio this year. But the most impressive one to fall might have been for the amount or marriage proposals.
Here’s the breakdown:
Brazilian rugby player Isadora Cerullo proposed to Marjorie Enya on the field (pictured).
(Photo by Alexander Hassenstein/Getty Images)
Britain’s Charlotte Dujardin held up a sign saying, “Will you marry me now?” to partner Dean Wyatt.
Diving silver medalist, China’s He Zi , got a ring from her long-time boyfriend Qin Kai.
British race walker Tom Bosworth asked his boyfriend Harry Dineley to BAE for life.
And finally, USA triple jump silver medalist, William Claye, proposed to USA hurdler Queen Harrison.
So there ya have it. Five, yes, FIVE, Olympic proposals … that we know of.
Ryan Lochte and three teammates robbed at gunpoint
Or were they??
(Photo by Matt Hazlett/Getty Images)
Lochte-Gate, or whatever you may call it, may go down as the most memorable non-athletic event of the 2016 Olympics. Was Lochte (and his teammates) robbed? Possibly. Did they have it coming to them? I don’t know. Go beat up a foreign gas station in a high-crime city late at night while intoxicated and see what happens.
Media members were nearly killed
This scary situation was certainly something not made up.
The water turned green!
What were the world’s best athletes swimming in? We’ll never know.
As the days progressed, so did the murky tint of the Olympic pool water. It started in the diving pool and before long the swimming pool had it’s own dark green color. Officials were unable to provide a plausible explanation and the problem went unsolved. Some athletes complained of eye irritation .
(Photo by Tom Pennington/Getty Images)
I guess it’s no worse than our local lake, right? Right?
Usain Bolt laughs at how slow everyone else is
The Jamaican wins a new batch of gold medals
… And was able to look back and smile in the process. It created some great memes, and a joke that got Ellen in some hot water.
Getty Images
Weightlifter boogies
David Katoatau, a weightlifter from the Pacific island nation of Kiribati, went viral after getting his groove on after dropping his weights.
He said he did it to raise awareness of climate change.
He told reporters the dance moves were meant to raise awareness about the threat that rising sea levels posed to his country, which is composed of 33 coral atolls.
“I want people to know more about us, so I use weight lifting, and my dancing, to show the world,” he told Reuters.
Smart (phone) fencer?
French fencer Enzo Lefort left his smartphone in his pocket while competing against Peter Joppich of Germany.
Here’s the result.
Lefort did not win.
Best grandparents ever cheer on grandson
A heartwarming moment for Kyle Chalmer’s and the rest of the world
The Australian swimmer took Rio gold in the 100 meters freestyle. His grandma and grandpa had a camera on them at home while they watched their grandson accomplish the feat. And it’s fantastic.
Olympic divers look like porn stars
Buzzfeed reminded us that accidental censorship from TV graphics makes Olympic divers look like this:
The massive rodents
They’re called capybaras
… And they took over the Olympic golf course. I think they’re bad ass.
(Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images)
F-YOU!
How does Santo Condorelli celebrate?
By flipping off his father! Before every race!
(Photo credit should read GABRIEL BOUYS/AFP/Getty Images)
The Canadian swimmer finished fourth in the 100 meters men’s freestyle, but left with the release of possibly the best pre-game ritual known to man.
His dad returns the favor, raising his middle finger right back at him. Joseph says the ritual started when his son was eight years old. At that age, Santo was facing swimmers who were bigger and even older than him, so in order to get him in the right mindset, Joseph would flip him off. “It became a good ritual for both of us,” he said, per the New York Daily News. “He got a lot of his aggravation out with just a really simple ‘Give it to the world’ rather than keep it internalized. It calms him down on the blocks for sure.”
And finally …
The Michael Phelps stare of death
As if the Olympics’ all-time greatest medalist wasn’t intimidating enough
This death-stare will go down as one of the craziest intimidating tactics (or omen) in Olympics history. The gold medalist claims it was nothing. But we know better.
Don’t shadow box in front of Michael Phelps. In fact, unless you’re getting paid, just don’t shadow box. Ever.
Thanks for the memories, Rio.
Josh Helmuth is the editor of Crave Sports