There was a time when some people – the “not sports” people – would only watch the Super Bowl for the advertisements. But thanks to the internet all these folks can take that Sunday off, every year. All you have to do is wait for the trailers to premiere online, and watch them at your leisure.
But let’s be honest here: it’s still a lot of trailers, and not all of them are any good. That’s why every year we take a hard look at the Super Bowl trailers and pit them against each other in a ranked cage match, or something like that. (We’re “not sports” people.) Which trailers blew our minds? Which trailers CHANGED our minds? And which trailers will we put out of our minds altogether as soon as we’re done with this article?
You’re about to find out. Here are all the Super Bowl movie trailers, good and bad, ranked from worst to best.
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11. LIFE (March 24, 2017)
There’s nothing terribly wrong with this preview for Life, or with the full-length trailer it encourages us to watch online (included here for posterity). But there’s nothing terribly interesting about it either. It’s a story about scientists coming into contact with an alien organism and getting menaced by it, and aside from the creature design (or lack thereof) there’s nothing in these previews to distinguish this film from Alien, The Thing or any other film about basically the same thing. We’re hoping the film has some surprises up its sleeve, because right now the advertising campaign makes it look awfully familiar, and that doesn’t stand out against the Super Bowl advertising crowd.
10. BAYWATCH (May 26, 2017)
The 30-second preview for Baywatch, an intentional comedy based on the (mostly) unintentionally funny lifeguard television series, mostly rehashes jokes from the film’s pre-existing, longer theatrical trailer. Points for putting Zac Efron in an American flag speedo though. That’s patriotism.
9. A CURE FOR WELLNESS (February 17, 2017)
Gore Verbinski’s upcoming horror thriller apparently warranted two Super Bowl spots. One of those spots was great (we’ll get to it eventually), and the other is… okay. It’s a standard collection of creepy imagery from a horror movie set in a health clinic. Gore Verbinski is an impressive visual stylist but there’s nothing setting this particular preview apart from other films of its ilk. The second preview though… again, we’ll get to that. Soon.
8. JOHN WICK: CHAPTER 2 (February 10, 2017)
20th Century Fox had quite a bit of success last year when it promoted the action-comedy Deadpool as a Valentine’s Day release. They’re up to some similar tricks with these two Super Bowl spots for the action sequel John Wick: Chapter 2, trying to trick audiences into thinking they’re watching a Fifty Shades Darker preview in the first spot, and simply amping up the sexiness in the second. It’s a cute gag but, unlike Deadpool (which actually was a weird romance), John Wick: Chapter 2 comes across like it’s making fun of romance movies, which probably won’t build up much of a crossover audience between the genres. So yeah, again, it’s kind of a cute gag, but it just doesn’t have the same effect.
7. LOGAN (March 3, 2017)
A short and moody preview for Logan features very little plot, and a lot of shots we’ve seen in earlier previews, but our best look yet at Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) and X-23 (Dafne Keen) in action, flipping around and stabbing a bunch of goons who, we assume, are not nice people. The marketing push for this film is nearing completion, audiences are already aware of it, and this quick preview of Logan does the job it needs to do: it doesn’t let all the other movies take the spotlight just one month before its release date.
6. PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES (May 26, 2017)
The once-mighty Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, now long adrift at sea, makes an impressive comeback with a Super Bowl preview that offers gorgeous eye candy, and little of the dopey humor, overblown hero worship and unnecessarily complicated storylines that nearly sank the series. The question now is whether Johnny Depp – after a string of box office failures and, more importantly, a tarnished personal reputation – is going to drive audiences away from the films he transformed into blockbusters. Time will tell, but for now, in a vacuum, this preview might just be visually interesting enough to raise a few eyebrows, and get the fans interested once again. Maybe.
5. GHOST IN THE SHELL (March 30, 2017)
Explaining the highfalutin plot of Ghost in the Shell might be a bit tricky in a short Super Bowl spot, so this particular preview focuses on some of the upcoming film’s obvious strengths. Namely, Scarlett Johansson (who has become one of our leading action heroes) and a cavalcade of spectacular images. Few other films on the horizon look as spectacular, visually, as Ghost in the Shell. If the story turns out to be as good as the original, and if the whitewashing we’re all worried about isn’t a problem once we see all the context, we might all be in for a real treat.
4. TRANSFORMERS: THE LAST KNIGHT (June 23, 2017)
The trailer for the latest Transformers movie tries, once again, to make the story of product placements punching each other into grim, serious business. But whether that excites you or bores you, we can all agree that Michael Bay has an eye for the epic, and that this extended Super Bowl preview is full of impressive eye candy, guaranteeing that audiences who think of motion pictures as a thrill ride will plunk down their hard-earned money on opening day. This is a great advertisement for a movie that, despite all this publicity, doesn’t technically look all that great.
3. A CURE FOR WELLNESS (February 17, 2017)
One of the biggest surprises of the night was this other, dastardly little ad for A Cure for Wellness, that upcoming horror film about the sinister goings-on at a health clinic. This preview cleverly adopts the format of a prescription medication commercial, except the typical utopian imagery gradually becomes disturbing as the list of side effects gradually becomes terrifying. Films that are coming out within a month of the Super Bowl don’t usually have such eye-catching previews because, again, the marketing campaign has already been doing its job. The folks promoting A Cure for Wellness took this one last chance to make a great impression, and they succeeded. This preview was an inspired bit of advertising.
2. GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL. 2 (May 5, 2017)
One of the most unexpectedly popular movies of the last decade is back with a sequel that, in this extended preview, had to prove to audiences that it wasn’t a one-hit wonder. It does a pretty good job, reviving the old school soundtrack, snarky characters and slightly dickish humor (“I tried, guys…”) while throwing in impressive new imagery and unusual new characters. There’s still not much in the way of plot, but in terms of action and attitude, this Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 preview delivered.
1. THE FATE OF THE FURIOUS (April 14, 2017)
The preview for the eighth film in the Fast and the Furious franchise packs a whole lot of punch in just sixty short seconds, telling us what the film is about (Dominic Toretto going rogue), why that’s awesome (because Jason Statham has to join the good guys to stop him), and what sort of insane car stunts they’ve put in the film this time (submarine chases, vehicles falling out of buildings en masse). Make no mistake, The Fate of the Furious looks fucking sweet.
The 40 (Other) Best Superhero Movies Ever:
Top Photo: Marvel Studios
William Bibbiani (everyone calls him ‘Bibbs’) is Crave’s film content editor and critic. You can hear him every week on The B-Movies Podcast and Canceled Too Soon, and watch him on the weekly YouTube series Most Craved, Rapid Reviews and What the Flick. Follow his rantings on Twitter at @WilliamBibbiani.
The OTHER Best Superhero Movies Ever Made
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40. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze
The second Ninja Turtles movie had more in common with the cartoon series than the darker, more serious first movie. But despite the pervasive silliness there's a lot to like about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II, if only ironically. The unapologetically campy "Ninja Rap" by Vanilla Ice will always hold a place in some people's hearts.
Photo: New Line Cinema
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39. The Crow: Wicked Prayer
Edward Furlong dons the gothic face paint in the fourth movie based on James O'Barr's tragic revenge comic, and while it's not nearly as good as the original, Wicked Prayer is a lot more interesting than the middle two films. David Boreanaz and Tara Reid overact the hell out of their villain parts, and Six-String Samurai director Lance Mungia overloads the film with wonky weirdness. It's a mess, but it's a very watchable mess.
Photo: Dimension Films
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38. Avengers Grimm
Fairy tale princesses follow the wicked Rumplestiltskin through the magic mirror to modern day Los Angeles, and wage a war with abilities culled from their various stories. (Sleeping Beauty puts bad guys in a trance, Rapunzel attacks with her hair, you get the idea.) The budget is painfully low and the acting is all over the place, but the script is undeniably solid, with a fully-realized fantasy world and entertaining riffs on old archetypes. With a bigger budget Avengers Grimm might have been a lot higher on this list.
Photo: The Asylum
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37. The Green Hornet
Seth Rogen and Jay Chou have fantastic chemistry in The Green Hornet, a film that sets out to dissect the superhero/sidekick relationship and does a good job of it. Christoph Waltz is also an excellent villain, who only turns to masks and gimmicks because of a mid-life crisis. Unfortunately, the action, the pacing and the third act are mediocre at best, leaving The Green Hornet feeling like an amiable misfire instead of a genuinely good flick.
Photo: Columbia Pictures
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36. The Return of Captain Invincible
Alan Arkin plays a has-been superhero forced out of retirement in this bizarre Aussie musical. The Return of Captain Invincible isn't as funny as it thinks it is, but it's worth watching just to hear Christopher Lee croon about being, essentially, an evil bartender.
Photo: Seven Keys
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35. The Guyver
An adaptation of a violent manga series, The Guyver isn't very well written but it features cool action sequences and astounding makeup effects by co-director Screaming Mad George.
Photo: New Line Cinema
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34. My Super Ex-Girlfriend
A clever screenplay is sabotaged by hokey direction in My Super Ex-Girlfriend, about a hapless boob who dates a superhero, breaks up with her, and discovers that all that grim 'n' gritty emotional baggage has consequences. If you can look past shoddy fight scenes and obvious rom-com staging, you'll be able to see that screenwriter Don Payne understood superheroes very, very well.
Photo: 20th Century Fox
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33. Hancock
Will Smith is great as a superhero whose isolation leads him to self-destruction in Hancock, a film that draws smart parallels between costumed crime-fighting and Hollywood celebrity. Unfortunately, the film's second half abandons that concept entirely, in favor of endless exposition and pointless action. Both halves average out to a watchable mixed bag.
Photo: Columbia Pictures
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32. Hellboy
Guillermo Del Toro's fanciful adaptation of Mike Mignola's stylish comic book series gets all the monsters and makeup just right, but saddles the audience with a boring human protagonist who does nothing but distract from the star attraction: Ron Perlman, perfectly cast as a grumbling, satanic monster-hunter with a heart of gold.
Photo: Columbia Pictures
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31. Doctor Mordrid
Horror star Jeffrey Combs was never suaver than he was in this low-budget Doctor Strange knockoff, about a master sorcerer trying to stop his oldest enemy from rising to power. Doctor Mordrid suffers from a low budget, but the film has its moments, like a nifty climactic stop-motion dinosaur skeleton fight.
Photo: Full Moon Entertainment
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30. Hero At Large
John Ritter is positively charming as a naive actor who accidentally inspires New York City when he stops a liquor store robbery while he's still in his superhero costume. Hero At Large has smart things to say about the rocky relationship between what's real and what really matters, but it's probably too long by about half an hour.
Photo: MGM
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29. RoboCop 2
From the director of The Empire Strikes Back and the writer of The Dark Knight Returns came a jokier RoboCop, but one that nevertheless boasts non-stop social satire and kick-ass action sequences. It's not as good as the original, but it's not as bad as a lot of people remember.
Photo: Orion Pictures
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28. Sky High
Witty in-jokes and hilarious cameos elevate an otherwise lightweight teen comedy, about the son of a superhero who gets sidelined at school because he hasn't gotten his powers yet. It's a fun film, but the climax veers way too far into silly territory.
Photo: Buena Vista Pictures
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27. Kick-Ass
Kick-Ass has serious script problems - like a title hero who has almost no impact on the story whatsoever - but the good parts are damn near unforgettable, particularly a scene-stealingly weird performance by Nicolas Cage and a badass (and utterly irresponsible) mass murdering turn by a young Chloe Grace Moretz.
Photo: Lionsgate
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26. V for Vendetta
In spite of an ending that completely, shamelessly misses the point of what its protagonist stood for, this handsome adaptation gets a lot of things right, with a revolutionary mentality and memorable star turns by Hugo Weaving and Natalie Portman.
Photo: Warner Bros.
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25. Behind the Mask
Behind the Mask is the second in a trilogy of films based on The Shadow (all of them released in 1946), and it's easily the best, with masked vigilante Lamont Cranston juggling a false murder accusation and his charismatic but meddling girlfriend in equal measure. Light, quirky, admittedly dated, but still a lot of fun.
Photo: Monogram Pictures
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24. The Shadow
Alec Baldwin took over as The Shadow in this handsome, pulpy thriller that failed to find an audience but has aged rather well, thanks to sly performances, a winking sense of humor and surprisingly creepy set pieces.
Photo: Universal Pictures
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23. Megamind
A supervillain finally kills his arch-nemesis, takes over the city, and immediately suffers from an existential crisis in Megamind, a movie that doesn't always fire on all cylinders - the details are head-scratching at best - but gets by on personality and showmanship.
Photo: Paramount Pictures
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22. The Toxic Avenger
Vicious, puerile, disgusting... these are all points in The Toxic Avenger's favor. The breakout film from Troma told the story of a nerd who fell into a vat of chemicals, mutated into a monster, got superpowers, and became homicidal whenever evil people were around. And there are some UNBELIEVABLY evil people in Tromaville. It's a divisive film, but then most of the truly "cult" films are.
Photo: Troma
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21. Hellboy II: The Golden Army
Guillermo Del Toro ditched the boring non-hero and focused on the title monster. A wise move that makes this sequel the superior Hellboy. The plot isn't quite as captivating as the movie makes it out to be, but the impossible menagerie of masterful makeup effects more than compensates.
Photo: Universal Pictures
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20. Griff the Invisible
Strange and wonderful, the Australian import Griff the Invisible is the story of a socially awkward office worker who spends his nights protecting the neighborhood. He picks up an unexpected partner on his quest to build an invisibility cloak, but looks can be deceiving... on multiple levels. A bittersweet and very good film about the thin line between fantasy and delusion.
Photo: Vivendi Entertainment
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19. Buffy the Vampire Slayer
A shallow cheerleader inherits supernatural powers and overwhelming responsibilities in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, a clever and funny film whose biggest crime is not being half as good as the spin-off television series, which expanded on the characters and the mythology. Still, the original Buffy holds up rather well as a 1990s high school superhero comedy, with Kristy Swanson kicking butt and Paul Reubens and Rutger Hauer stealing scenes.
Photo: 20th Century Fox
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18. The Powerpuff Girls Movie
An impressive fusion of bright colors and total darkness, the unexpectedly melancholy origin of the hit Cartoon Network superheroes left some audiences baffled. But for those who take Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup seriously (as well as their arch-nemesis, Mojo Jojo), this energetic motion picture hits all the right marks.
Photo: Warner Bros.
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17. The Watchmen
Zack Snyder adapted one of the most unadaptable graphic novels in history, and to his credit he got a lot of it right. The sense of history and scale is spot on, and the cast of characters comes to life: victories, failures and all. Strange visual cues and controversial changes to the story keep The Watchmen from achieving greatness, but sometimes it actually comes close.
Photo: Warner Bros.
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16. The Mask
A loverlorn loser dons a magical mask and becomes... well, not a superhero, but a superpowered explosion of unbridled id. Jim Carrey gives the perfect cartoon performance in The Mask, a film that brims with style and energy and mania.
Photo: New Line Productions
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15. Orgazmo
From the creators of South Park came a low-budget comedy about a Mormon who became a porn star, who then became a superhero. It's as dumb as it sounds, but that's at least partly the point: Trey Parker has so much fun sending up superhero movies and pornography that you almost forget that the film has hardly any sex or nudity in it, or that it actually has intelligent things to say about the evolution of individual morality and the social impact of adult cinema.
Photo: Rogue Pictures
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14. Mystery Men
Lots of superhero stories are about how one man or woman is destined for greatness. In Mystery Men we meet a whole group of wannabes who are destined for mediocrity, but who get a brief moment to shine when the city's biggest superhero is kidnapped. A hilarious film that's full of wonderful characters. It's a mystery why Mystery Men doesn't have a bigger cult following.
Photo: Universal Pictures
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13. The Specials
A low-budget superhero comedy about a middling superhero team - on their day off, no less - the conversational and intelligent comedy The Specials dissects the everyday nonsense that would have to befall every costumed crime fighter. By bringing these titans down to our level, we are reminded that heroism isn't a 24/7 occupation, and that our greatest heroes are usually just dorks like the rest of us. A great superhero comedy, written by future Guardians of the Galaxy director James Gunn.
Photo: Anchor Bay
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12. The Mark of Zorro (1940)
Tyrone Power cuts a dashing figure as the masked crime fighter Zorro, who spurns his affluent upbringing and risks life and limb to bring equality to the poor. It's a rollicking adventure of the highest caliber, and somehow it's not even the best Zorro movie.
Photo: 20th Century Fox
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11. Darkman
Future Spider-Man director Sam Raimi cut his superhero teeth on Darkman, a stylish and kick-ass action/adventure about a scientist who loses his face and has to steal the identities of bad guys to find revenge and save his ex-girlfriend. Liam Neeson is impressively unhinged, as is Raimi's virtuoso filmmaking. Darkman is like a classic Universal Monster movie crossed with a modern superhero thriller. It's equal parts weird and wonderful.
Photo: Universal Pictures
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10. Unbreakable
M. Night Shyamalan's follow-up to the Oscar-nominated The Sixth Sense was ahead of its time, subverting superhero clichés before most audience members were able to even recognize them. But this dark parable about a family man re-discovering his true potential is masterfully filmed, impressively acted, and only let down by an ending that is almost comically rushed.
Photo: Buena Vista Pictures
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9. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
The first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie works better than it probably had any right to, with impressive costumes, cool fight scenes and an emotional storyline that actually made you care about whether these pizza-eating reptiles lived or died. And the messages about teen apathy and capitalist brainwashing is downright subversive, considering that this film was at the forefront of a massive merchandising empire.
Photo: New Line Cinema
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8. The Crow
The late, great Brandon Lee gave a heart-wrenching performance in his last film, based on the gothic revenge comic by James O'Barr. The Crow is a gorgeous music video pumped full of angst and anguish, an adrenaline shot of violent grief that overpowers its otherwise conventional storyline. It is tragedy, caught on camera, and whatever its flaws it is beautiful.
Photo: Miramax Films
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7. The Mask of Zorro
Grand, old-fashioned action abounds in Martin Campbell's The Mask of Zorro, which finds an older version of the iconic hero making way for a younger, feistier, more sensual leading man. Great sword fights, a sly sense of humor and the occasional creepy moment (that is NOT what you're supposed to do with a severed head) make The Mask of Zorro the second best Zorro movie.
Photo: TriStar Pictures
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6. Chronicle
A group of teenagers get superpowers, act like dumbasses, and then realize that with great power comes a great excuse to act out on your most deplorable urges. Josh Trank's Chronicle captures the fantasy and the horror of becoming more than human, in a film that plays a bit like an Americanized version of Akira, but also a lot like one of the best superhero movies ever made.
Photo: 20th Century Fox
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5. Super
The superhero genre got its own version of Taxi Driver in James Gunn's brutal comedy, about an emotionally troubled man who thinks God has chosen him to beat the crime out of his community with a wrench. Rainn Wilson gets himself a sidekick and tries to stop a local villain, only to confront the sad, sexual, violent realities of the superhero fantasy. Potent, powerful, kind of brilliant, Super is truly super.
Photo: IFC Films
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4. The Mark of Zorro (1920)
The original heroic ideal who put on a mask, carved his initials in evildoers and inspired us all to make better choices. Douglas Fairbanks' film came out only one year after Zorro first premiered in print. He co-wrote the screenplay and performed some amazing stunts. And this film helped define superhero storytelling in all mediums, comics and beyond.
Photo: United Artists
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3. The Rocketeer
The wonders of flight never seemed more wondrous than they do in Joe Johnston's The Rocketeer, a fabulous throwback to old school adventure about a dashing young hero who finds a jet pack, fights Nazis and proves he's a better man than Errol Flynn (kind of). This is the kind of superhero movie you assumed they always made, but maybe they only made it this once.
Photo: Buena Vista Pictures
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2. The Incredibles
The best Fantastic Four movie doesn't have The Fantastic Four in it. It's The Incredibles, Brad Bird's animated adventure about a family of people who have stunted their own potential in an ongoing effort to be normal, only to finally break out and become the superheroes they were always supposed to be. The philosophy is controversial: the film argues pretty hard that some people are special and some simply aren't. But as a metaphor for how we all feel (as opposed to how the world actually works), it's an inspiring, breathtakingly realized metaphor for the hero in each of us.
Photo: Pixar
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1. RoboCop
Part action movie, part horror movie, part social satire, all RoboCop. Paul Verhoeven's endlessly inventive sci-fi classic is about a cop his sacrifices his life, and then his identity after the corporate-owned police department turns him into a cyborg. The effects are incredible, the violence is unbelievable, the satire is biting, and the humanity is unmistakable. RoboCop isn't just one of the best movies about a superpowered hero. There's an argument to be made that it's one of the best movies. Period.
Photo: Orion Pictures
