We all know a guy like Steve Harrington from season one of Stranger Things. He’s cocky, he has enviable hair, sees women as sex objects (then judges them for being just that), and only looks out for himself. But something happened to Steve over the course of season two of the insanely popular sci-fi show. He softened in matters of the heart and grew a pair when it came to protecting kids from the Demogorgon. He even took on a father figure role for the endearingly lispy Dustin. There is hope for the Steve Harringtons of the world. They can be different men, better men. These are the steps they need to take to get there.
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Steve Harrington
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Admit that you're an asshole.
The first step to change is acknowledging where you're at. The bad news is you're a douche. The good news is you want to change.
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Stop winking.
Nobody wants to be on the receiving end of your wink.
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Stop drinking.
No one is their best self under the influence. Not even you.
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Start listening to people.
If you've been an asshole for a while, you've probably only been listening to one voice: your own. Now it's time to stop talking and start listening to others. It's the only way to learn.
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Read something.
Seriously. All streaming and no reading makes you an idiot. Books can re-train your brain like nothing else can.
Related: 5 Self-Help Books That Won't Make You Cringe
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Have an attitude of gratitude.
Show up. Be kind. Find something to be thankful for in every situation.
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Be open about your feelings.
Everyone has emotions. Real men share them.
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Do the grand gesture.
Own your fuck-ups, apologize, and make amends. This often involves flowers.
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Take charge.
Be a man with a plan. Ideally, a good plan. A smart plan. A foolproof plan.
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Go to bat for your loved ones.
Be courageous. Defend the defenseless.
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Learn how to throw a well-timed punch.
Violence is never the answer. But when negotiations break down, justified physical force might help get your point across.
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Take a beating.
Be proud of your battle scars. (And make sure the person you were defending sees them.)
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Be of wise counsel.
Relationships are give and take. In the past, you've only wanted to receive adoration and dish out criticism. Now it's time to use your hard-won experience to help others. Maybe you can guide the next generation away from the same mistakes you made.
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Encourage others.
Now that you're in a better place, it's time to spread the good vibes around.
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Embrace your new good guy role.
It might be more fun than you realize.
