In any romantic relationship, there comes a time when communication becomes difficult or even downright impossible. It’s like you’ve hit a glitch. For Akihiko Kondo, that glitch was actually real – because the 38-year-old’s bride is a hologram.
Kondo identifies as a “fictosexual,” meaning he’s sexually attracted to fictional characters. He married Hatsune Miku, a 16-year-old character with turquoise hair, in a 2018 ceremony that cost around $17,000. The couple “dated” for about 10 years before saying “I do.”
But now, because of technical difficulties, he can no longer speak to his wife. See, they were only able to communicate thanks to a $1,300 machine called Gatebox. The device facilitates interaction between people and characters through holograms. This is how Kondo was able to marry Miku.
But support for Gatebox software has been eliminated, so now the bride and groom can no longer speak.
“My love for Miku hasn’t changed,” he told Japanese newspaper Mainichi.
Perhaps that’s because while he doesn’t have the hologram version of Miku, he does have a life-size version of her that he carries around. (Because that’s not creepy.)
And yet, he must feel kind of scammed by the whole virtual nuptials thing because he said, “I held the wedding ceremony because I thought I could be with her forever.”
Yeah, well, welcome to the fleeting nature of marriage, dude. You can love a girl all you want, but there’s nothing stopping her from disappearing suddenly one day.
It’s kind of ironic that Kondo’s wife basically abandoned him, given that Kondo fell for Miku because he couldn’t handle rejection from women in the real world. In fact, at one point he became so depressed, “I stayed in my room for 24 hours a day, and watched videos of Miku the whole time.”
When he finally accessed Gatebox in 2017, he was psyched to interact with his Anime obsession and didn’t waste much time before proposing to his cartoon love interest. But it might’ve been a sign that this relationship was ill-fated when none of his family or co-workers showed up at the wedding ceremony.
Now, it’s only a matter of time until real-life women claim software glitches when guys want to talk their ears off. “Sorry, honey, I can’t hear what you’re saying. I’m having technical difficulties! Shutting down now!”
Cover Photo: Instagram
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