WASHINGTON, DC - APRIL 28: U.S. Rep Matt Gaetz (R-FL) questions U.S. Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas as he testifies before the House Judicary Committee at the Rayburn House Office Building on April 28, 2022 in Washington, DC. The House Judicary Committee held an oversight hearing of the Department of Homeland Security. (Photo by Kevin Dietsch/Getty Images)

5 Occupations Matt Gaetz Might Be Better Suited For

Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-Florida) is basically a useless bag of hair and forehead who may go to prison to prison for sex trafficking, but he spends his time concocting conspiracies to “own the libs” so it’s totally cool. Perhaps only Ted Cruz supersedes this shit weasel in the creepiness and lizard-like department.

For example, prosecutors are reportedly investigating whether Gaetz had a sexual relationship with a 17-year-old and paid for her travel. They’re also looking into payments he and a close associate made to young adult women he had relationships with. You know, because it’s not like any female of any age would ever willfully have sex with this creepo without money being involved.

Aside from the obviousness of being a sexual predator, Gaetz is basically a MAGA sycophant who has perpetuated all the outrageous 2020 election lies, claimed the Jan. 6 Capitol rioters were actually members of Antifa, fought against all Covid-19 measures and downplayed the pandemic, and probably a whole host of other horrible things we can’t quite remember.

Clearly, Matt Gaetz is totally unfit for office and democracy should impose a restraining order against him. That’s why we decided to come up with a helpful guide of occupations Matt Gaetz is better suited for.

Cover Photo: Kevin Dietsch (Getty Images)
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