Weird News: Police Find Tennessee Man In Bed With Mannequin He Stole From Hustler Store

It could have been her red lips. Or maybe it was her pink spandex dress. Hell, my money’s on the rhinestone stilettos. Who knows? But something about a Hollywood Hustler mannequin made her so damn hot in the eyes of one recent customer that she eventually wound up in his bed.

According to The Tennessean, 55-year-old Christopher Wade walked into the Nashville lingerie store Monday night alone but walked out with a sexed-up mannequin despite pleas from an employee to leave her in the store.

Shame.

The employee told police that Wade was in such a hurry to get his new lover home that he knocked off her left arm while walking out the door. It apparently wasn’t her arm that made Wade hornier than shit because he left it behind as he threw the rest of her in the back of his pickup truck.

A brief argument between Wade and the store employee ensued in the parking lot until Wade decided it was hump time and drove away. The employee jotted down Wade’s license plate number, and police were able to track him to a woman’s house nearby a short while later. Upon entering the house, they found Wade in bed with the mannequin, which was still wearing everything from the store.

Well, except for her left arm of course.

The employee told police that Wade seemed to be intoxicated, and for his sake, let’s hope that was the case.

This dude probably wouldn’t have been caught if he could’ve found the strength to not plow this poor mannequin: Surveillance Camera Catches Suspected Thief Humping A Mannequin

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