If we could wave a magic wand and make the entire Covid pandemic go away, we would. But we can’t. Somehow, though, we all managed to survive the past 18 months and counting (no, this thing’s not over yet) without losing all our marbles – or swearing off sex and relationships forever. In fact, and this may be the hindsight talking, it’s possible that our epic, sexless quarantine taught us a thing or two about dating .
After all, when the whole world shut down, we had to figure out new ways to relate to one another. We were all lonely and became unafraid to admit it. We let ourselves be vulnerable. We allowed strangers into our private spaces (even if only over video). Coronavirus royally fucked with our dating M.O. – but maybe that was for the best.
Today, we’re unpacking the eight surprising ways Covid changed dating for the better.
Cover Photo: D-Keine (Getty Images)
Covid Made Dating Better
It made us slow down.
Sure, we’ve had our share of falling into bed with total strangers and waking up the next morning unable to remember their names. But Covid killed all that. Instead, it forced us to get to know people, little by little, months before we were ever able to kindle a connection in person. It was tough, but we learned some things – like maybe there’s something to be said for the slow lane. Holding off on sex for a while spares everyone a lot of confusion, heartache, and STIs. (It also saved us a shit-ton of money on bad dates, but that’s a whole ‘nother story.) So forgive us if we no longer try to get into your pants before the check even comes now that we’re dating face-to-face again. We’ve simply decided we actually want to know you before we get down and dirty.
Masks brought back mystery.
Unless you were down with the whole Eyes Wide Shut thing before, masks have always been closer to the creepy, rather than sexy, end of the spectrum. But now that they’re part and parcel of dating, we kind of found the kink in their mystery, too – almost to the point where not wearing one is weird.
It put things in perspective.
Looking for a mate is serious business. Who knows how long it will be until coronavirus – or some other deadly virus – shuts down society again and has us stuck indoors for months at a time? Nowadays, we approach dating from a whole new perspective – one of not just getting our rocks off, but of potentially finding someone worth giving a rock to. One-night stands are fun, but they’re unreliable. We want to know who’s going to hoard toilet paper with us the next time the shit hits the fan.
It meant more sober dates.
Sure, you could show up to your virtual date drunk or drinking, but it really isn’t a good look. For better or worse, when a date takes place over Zoom, we want to get right down to business and find out if this person is someone we could see in our lives long-term. Booze obscures our judgment and bogs down what could otherwise be an efficient fact-finding mission. Now that we can get back on the town again, there will be plenty of opportunities to get shit-faced. Until then, we kind of like the clarity that comes with sobriety, not to mention the absence of agonizing hangovers.
It improved our conversation skills.
Because, really, what is there to do when you’re stuck in separate buildings with nothing but a Wi-Fi connection and a pair of screens between you?
It made us more selective.
We’ll admit it: we used to let boredom get the best of us. And with all those available ladies just lying in wait on an app, we could double and triple book to our libido’s content. We knew not all of those dates were going to be worth going on, but it was better than sitting at home alone. Now that we are literally risking our lives to meet up with people in person (or just putting up with the awkwardness of a Zoom date), we’ve become pickier – but not in a petty way. We simply don’t waste time anymore with women we know aren’t right for us. We vet smarter. And, to our delight, we’ve been less disappointed as a result.
It made us appreciate our exes.
Boy, pre-pandemic, we sure held grudges against people, especially those we used to date. Then we started imagining all our former loved ones besieged by Covid and we realized that maybe we had been a little harsh. You know the saying, “Be kind, for everyone is fighting a tough battle?” Yeah, that. Forgive us for being assholes, exes. We can – and will – do better.
It brought us closer to ourselves.
Cheesy, we know, but you can’t be a good partner if you don’t have a solid relationship with yourself first. The pandemic gave us tons of time to think, to analyze, and to reevaluate where we’d gone wrong, especially in our dating lives. The time-out from chasing tail has made us wiser, more mature, and a potentially better half.