The Mandatory Dating Guide For People Who Start Every Relationship From Their Phone This is the way we date now.
Condom Sales Surge Along With Sex Optimism (Now We Just Need Someone Crazy Enough to Do It With Us) As Americans fantasize about reviving their moribund sex lives, they’re taking precautions to make sure they don’t end up with…
Dude Stranded Alone On Ghost Ship For Four Years Is Our Pandemic Spirit Animal The loneliness and sheer disregard for his existence nearly drove Aisha mad.
Instagram Live Introduces 4-Way Chat, Yet Another Reason Forcing Us to Shower Without Ever Leaving the House Just be sure to soap up and rinse twice because nobody wants to watch the next generation of The View…
New Face Mask Amplifies Voices, Makes Karen and Her American Rights That Much Louder It’s called “Project Hazel” it’s not available to purchase yet since it’s just a concept. When it becomes available, consumers…
Pandemic Depression Teams Up With Seasonal Depression For the Ultimate End of Year Knockout (10 Ways to Overcome It) They say the best defense is a good offense, so we’re going on the offense to combat what we have…
Rudy Giuliani Shockingly Tests Positive for COVID, Perfect Little Bow on Top of a Terrible Year In a move that is surprising to absolutely nobody, current-but-soon-to-be-former President Trump (God that feels good to write) has announced…
Mouthwash Reportedly Can Kill COVID, Study Says Start Gargling, Sucker In the mintiest fresh study of all time, researchers tried many different styles and brands of mouthwash to determine the…
New iPhone Update Allows Users to Opt in For COVID Notifications, Most Likely a Series of Sad Mask-Free Emoji Faces This is the big problem with all contact tracing technology. In order for it to actually work, people need to…
Doctor Runs 22 Miles With Mask to Prove It Doesn’t Affect Your Oxygen, If You Pass Out It’s Purely Because You’re Out of Shape Lawton, who is an ICU doctor in England, put on his mask and started the 22-mile run between his home…