In 2005, Penn Jillette and comedian Paul Provenza produced The Aristocrats, a documentary on the dirtiest joke ever told. The joke’s origins are sketchy, however many believe it dates back to the vaudevillian era. Whatever its history, the joke allows for lots of improvisation and has become a competitive endeavor among comedians. Whoever tells it in the filthiest and most offensive way wins! Below are some of our favorite (and most disturbing) video clips from the movie.
Gilbert Gottfried
After watching Gilbert Gottfried’s telling it’s truly frightening to think that this man has done extensive voice work for children’s educational programming. Once he gets started it’s a runaway train of vulgarity with imagery that some of the best visual effects houses in Hollywood would be hard pressed to create.
Sarah Silverman
Sarah Silverman puts an autobiographical spin on things by inserting herself as a player in this deranged family act. Her sincere first person account adds a level of creepiness that may leave you unsettled, laughing on the floor or both. She caps things off with an accusation against octogenarian radio and TV personality Joe Franklin that nearly resulted in a real life defamation lawsuit (Silverman’s version starts at the 1:27 mark).
The Boys From South Park
Do you want to see what “South Park” creators Trey Parker and Matt stone would do if there were no such things as network standards and FCC regulations? Then watch this version immediately.
Bob Saget
While it’s no secret anymore that Bob Saget is one of the most foul-mouthed and crass comedians in the universe, his telling may still leave some Full House fans believing that Danny Tanner has been possessed by Lucifer himself. In case you’re wondering, the Olson twins or Uncle Jesse don’t appear in the joke, but it’s amazing just the same.
George Carlin
How can you leave off the man who created the list of Seven Dirty Words? (5:55 in)
Martin Mull
As you’ve figured out by now, this joke is not about the punch line. Martin Mull turns that notion on its head by delivering a final zinger that will have you laughing your ass off instead of wondering what the hell you just heard.
Steven Banks
Now that you’ve heard several versions of the joke, it’s time to go in a different direction and reveal what may be the most creative and hilarious version yet. Mime Steven Banks’ telling marks the first and last time a mime will be this funny to anyone over the age of 7. Tip: Don’t get distracted by the reactions of the people eating lunch in the background. His performance deserves your full attention.