We often hear the phrase “when the shit hits the fan” in our daily lives, but such is life when a Florida man tweaked it to “when the shit hits the man” and actually hurled his feces at a judge in court. Regardless, this bold defendant was somehow still acquitted. Because, hey, that’s Florida.
According to reports, Dorleans Philidor was on trial for burglary charges, but before jurors were present and during the morning docket routine, Philidor excreted on himself and threw his load in the direction of Judge Lisa Walsh. According to witnesses, he yelled “It’s protein. It’s good for you!”
Lawyers reportedly scattered away from the scat while officers took the man down. Not only that, the (clearly) insane man also decided to eat some of his own feces in the midst of this chaos. Proceedings continued in a different courtroom where a jury acquitted Philidor of the burglary charge. He’s still on the hook for grand theft auto in a different trial, where we assume he’ll likely take things up a notch and admit to voting Republican in 2016 before getting acquitted for pleading insanity.
Cover Photo: RichLegg (Getty Images)
Meanwhile in Florida:
She’s out to get him: Florida Man Called 911 Because His Wife Was A ‘Black Widow Spider’
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