The Holiday Inn is taking away its free miniature bottles, the one reason we ever agreed to stay at a Holiday Inn in the first place. While Trump is adding plastic pollution to our lives, InterContinental Group is taking away shampoos, conditioners and bath gels (which total nearly 200 million per year) from nearly a million of their hotel rooms in waste reduction sustainable efforts (while probably saving a few bucks in the process). The already gross stereotype of the average Holiday Inn vacationer is expected to get exponentially more repugnant, as hotel guests will be forced to confine themselves to their rooms in greasy efforts to hide their hideous, filthy bodies until their sheets can be lightly rinsed (cold water probably) for the next poor bastard. The new bulk-sized dispensers will be harder to fit into carry-ons and purses, but customers have been known to do just about anything to feel victorious after a depressing hotel experience.
Democrats Leave Debate With New Unintended Slogans
Plastic Pollution Proves Sea Creatures Are Absolute Slobs We Assumed Them to Be
Cover: khamlaksana (Getty Images)
Weird News Listicle 7-25-2019
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Weird Food Trends: Breatharians Are Living on Organic, Filtered Air
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Some People Will Do Anything to Get Out of Work (Like Run Someone Over)
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Kids Teach Alexa to Fart and Grandpa Can’t Get Enough of It
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The FDA Approved A Shot That Makes Women Horny, Finally
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Meanwhile in Florida: Man Breaks Into Wendy’s, Makes Himself Late-Night Snack
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Research Suggests Your Smartphone is Literally Making You Horny
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We’re Spending a Ton of Money Drunk Shopping Online
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Man Survived as Bear Food for a Month by Drinking His Own Urine
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People Are Wearing AirPods During Sex Because We Don’t Even Know
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Uber Driver Caught Jerking (Off Behind) the Wheel, Predictably Pulls Sex Toy On Cops
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Meanwhile in Florida: Man Throws Feces At Judge, Jury Somehow Finds Him Not Guilty
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Bill Cosby Teaches Prison Inmates About Being Role Models and Irony