Shopping for the perfect holiday gift is a pain in the ass. It involves thoughtfulness, time, and money. And no matter how hard you scour the internet (and brick-and-mortar shops) for the ultimate gift, you can tell from the look on your girlfriend’s face she’s never that stoked about her AC/DC Box Set and brand new set of golf clubs.
The plague of Christmas gifting is a tale as old as time, which is why it’s so impressive that a California woman finally devised a gift hack with almost zero side effects.
Gift guru Ekaterina Zharkova was in the middle of shoplifting $328,000 worth of merchandise from a Costa Mesa Nordstrom Rack when an officer from the California Highway Patrol’s Organized Retail Theft unit spotted her. The officer tailed Zharkova to her house, where they discovered a horde of designer goods stashed in a large pile on the floor.
What at first glance looked to be a career thief stealing clothes on their way to the garbage heap and reselling them via an internet luxury consignment shop, turned out to be a gifting genius deftly weaseling her way out of the commercial pressures of Christmas.
Now Zharkova faces four felony counts of grand theft, one felony count of receiving stolen property, and seven misdemeanor counts of petty theft, totaling nearly a decade of no more Secret Santas.
District Attorney and fabled grinch Todd Spitzer commented, “These are not victimless crimes and if you engage in these kinds of outrageous theft schemes we’re going to arrest you, we’re going to prosecute you, and we’re putting you behind bars.”
Meaning, this Christmas holiday Lady Zharkova will be going away for a long, long time. But at least she scored herself a robust Get Out of Gifting Free card. Worth every penny.
Cover Photo: ORANGE COUNTY SHERIFF’S DEPARTMENT
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