Time to become a celebrity basketball player, make a notoriously terrible video game, wait a few decades, try to collect money from people on the internet to make a sequel to the game, despite the fact that you are wealthy beyond belief, do some slam dunks or something and check out these links!
The Face Behind Bitcoin
His name is Satoshi Nakamoto. Meanwhile, here’s the guy behind Dogecoin.
Batkid Got Bumped From The Oscars, But Still Hung Out With Spider-Man
I mean, they had to spend 45 minutes eating pizzas and taking selfies.
Shaq Is Crowd Funding A ‘Shaq-Fu’ Sequel
http://www.theverge.com/2014/3/6/5477472/shaq-fu-sequel-crowdfunding
For $500, Shaq will follow you on Instagram. For $750, Shaq will send a video of himself laughing at you.
A Very Important And Scientific Ranking Of Jerry’s Girlfriends On Seinfeld
I think the author man-handled this well.
12-Year-Old Couldn’t Begin To Guess Name Of Friend Whose House He Visits To Play Xbox
http://www.theonion.com/articles/12yearold-couldnt-begin-to-guess-name-of-friend-wh,35442/
If I were a kid, I would’ve 1000% wanted my nickname to be “Flamethrower.”
That’s all for this this unmasked edition of The Big List!
Geoffrey Golden is a bestselling author and Editor-in-Chief of The Devastator comedy magazine.