Erections can sometimes be horrendous. Like when they last for 36 hours and almost kill you. That’s what happened to 41-year-old Englishman Elliott Rossiter when he visited a friend in France and developed an erection that just wouldn’t beat it. Maybe it’s something in the water, but Rossiter’s baguette (we had to) was so painful that his friends convinced him to go to the hospital after 19 hours. While this sounds like an awesome problem to have, apparently the hard-on was far from sexual, with the merest touch causing untold pain. When the clinicians injected Rossiter’s torpedo with an anti-inflammatory solution and nothing softened, they rushed him to a surgeon who declared his penis must be cut. Luckily for Rossiter, only a small incision was necessary to save his little friend. The surgeon drained the excess collection of blood and reduced Rossiter’s rock hard python to the tadpole it sought to become. In the end, another dickhead was saved.
Photo: Daniel Ingold (Getty Images)
Alcohol-free fun: The Mandatory Dating Guide to Being With a Sober Person
MORE WEIRD NEWS:
Low budget, no budget: RANKED! Our 20 Favorite Indie Films of the Last 20 Years
Follow Mandatory on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
Deadly Erection
-
The FDA Approved A Shot That Makes Women Horny, Finally
-
People Are Wearing AirPods During Sex Because We Don’t Even Know
-
Husband Worried His Empowered Wife Might Be Done Faking Her Orgasms
-
Siri Has Been Listening to You Have Sex, Probably Climaxes Too
-
Look, No Hands! Chinese Dick Pump Is the Sex Machine of Our Dreams
-
Woman Puts Octopus on Her Face, Wins Photo Contest (Reward Goes Toward Hospital Bills)
-
Extreme Yogi Survives 80-Foot Fall, Proves Yoga Works
-
Woman Brings Emotional Support Pony on Flight, Gives Everybody Else in Airport Anxiety
-
Meanwhile in Florida: Orlando Man Punches His Way to Faster Fast Food
-
Meanwhile in Florida: Woman All But Defecates in Local Ice Cream Shop
-
Keto Diet Is a Heart Attack on a Plate, Researchers Suggest Putting Down the Fat, Fatty
-
Martian Cabin Prototype For Rent in Most Uninhabitable City of All