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Meanwhile in Florida: Criminal Glitterbombers Arrested After Forgetting There Is No Possible Way to Hide Their Trail

Ah, Florida. You can always count on the Sunshine State for the most ridiculous crimes, and this one definitely doesn’t disappoint. Two women were recently arrested for glitterbombing a guy. Yes, glitter is considered a weapon, and if you use it in the great state of Florida to terrorize someone, it’s considered a crime (as it should be).

Meet 29-year-old Sarah Franks and 27-year-old Kaitlin O’Donovan. They showed up at Jacob Colon’s Clearwater home and lured him outside. When he emerged from the sliding glass door of his ground-floor apartment and stepped onto the patio, the two ladies pounced. After a verbal assault, they pummeled him with funfetti and glitter.

When Colon tried to escape into his apartment, O’Donovan followed, and let loose another few fistfuls of glitter. Then Franks ran around to the front door, which O’Donovan opened. The two continued their tirade. Franks even kicked out a window. (What merited all this rage is still unknown.)

After the devilish duo finally fled, Colon called the police, and provided the ladies’ names and address. When police arrived at their bachelorette pad, they noted that the perpetrators’ vehicle “was still warm to the touch and glitter was observed on the inside.”

These two besties now face felony charges.

Oh, ladies. Did you really think you weren’t going to leave a shimmering, shiny trail behind? Everyone knows there’s absolutely no way to cover your tracks when glitter is involved.

Cover Photo: Clearwater Police Department

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