Florida

Meanwhile in Florida: Hypocrite Calls Police Over Lack of Social Distancing in Bar After Trying to Kiss Everyone, Apparently Forgot How Alcohol Works

When it comes to social distancing, there are two types of people: those who give a shit about other human beings, and people like this lady. Audra Adams, a resident of Brevard County in Florida (because where else?) was recently arrested on charges of trespassing after warning, disorderly conduct, resisting an officer without violence and misuse of a 911 system. That misuse came about during a rather…eventful…night at a local bar, in which Adams called 911 multiple times to complain that people were not social distancing.

The problem is, Adams herself was the biggest offender, as she was attempting to kiss various patrons. After numerous people reported Adams’ harassment to management, the police were called. It’s a surprise that anybody answered, however, because the police were already at the aforementioned bar, talking to Adams. In fact, the last time Adams tried calling 911, she was literally talking to the police already, in person. When confronted about both her misuse of 911 and the sexual assaults, Adams became belligerent (surprise) and was asked to leave the premises (bigger surprise). She refused, then stated that she would “stay in the parking lot all night.”

She didn’t. She went to jail. We admire her for taking a stand against social distancing but, as they say, the path to hell (or jail, in this case) is paved with good intentions.

Cover Photo: Brevard County Sheriff’s Office

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